My favorite biblical conspiracy theory. Simeon bar Yonah, was a fisherman until he became a disciple. Jesus had faith in him so he called him his rock, the steady foundation that could always be relied on. The Greek for rock is Petros. As it just so happens, Simeon was son of Yonah, as the prefix “bar” shows, in English it would be Simon “the Rock” Johnson. And in case anyone is curious, Dwayne happens to mean fish hook. Also, the modern day Rock has a daughter called Simone, bringing us full circle. And thus we have proven biblical prophecy, or something, I’m not a quantum.
It’s not surprising, it’s what cult leaders do all the time.
Hey, in defense of Jesus, he’s like the singlularly good thing about modern Christians… If only they acted like him, they’d be far more respected.
The guy that said that he didn’t come to bring peace but to bring the sword?
The guy that said that everyone who isn’t with him is against him?
The guy that said that compared to your feelings for him you should hate your parents, wife and children?
Christianity is rotten to the core.
Mark 9:40 for whoever is not against us is for us.
Context is important when reading any historical text.
Yes, Jesus is STILL better than his followers.
Lol yeah, even with all that baggage.
It’s largely a made up story told well after the fact by several people, all of which are contradictory. I don’t disagree with you, except that we don’t really know how he acted. He may have been real, but he could have been a total ass and his followers just left that out.
The sermon on the mount is largely believed to have been delivered by the historical Jesus which was pretty cool stuff to say and which the modern Evangelical movement almost entirely ignores except for vague references to judgement which they misinterpret as it suits them
Yea, but that’s also true of Muhammad and every other figure from history.
The point is their freaking namesake deity’s prescription for behavior is infinitely more mature and respectable than them.
Jesus will always be Josh to me
Josh Christ or just Josh?
I mean, when other people will yell JESUS CHRIST! what do you cry out?
Josh the Oiled!
Greasy Josh
Joshua the Nazarene. It sounds better in Aramaic
Just Yeshua…
Josh Yeshua?
Yesh.
Cheese and crackers!
Also known as Cheese and Biscuits in the UK.
Ahh, the lost Gospel of Levi who is called Biff
Oily Josh and the greasy boys
Didn’t that also happen to Paul or Saul or whatever his name was?
He changed his name himself because he got brain damage from falling off a horse and decided to become a Christian
He also seemed to have hallucinations / schizophrenia, also got in a fight with Jesus’s brother in a temple in Jerusalem like 12 years after Jesus’s death. At least this is some information we can scrape together.
Also shout out to a book called Zealot by Reza Aslan all about cobbling together an historic representation of the Jesus the man, from various pieces of evidence.
My favorite part has always been how all those middle eastern guys had total fucking British white guy names like Peter, and Paul, Timothy, Thomas, Andrew, fucking Bartholomew ( fucking Bart‽ Really‽), James, Philip. If you’re stupid enough to go along with that horseshit, how in the fuck do you remember to breathe? Nobody that believes a word of the bible is qualified to operate metal eating utensils.
… are you being serious right now?
The reason that those are British names are:
1 Because of Christianity’s immense influence - native British names would be more like ‘Æthelwulf’ and ‘Ecgberht’
AND
2 Because those names are heavily anglicized. ‘Peter’ coming from ‘Petros’, itself the Hellenized form of ‘Cephas’.
In case anyone wants them, here’s one of the translations (we’re changing alphabet, millenia, as well as language, so you’re not going to get any consistency)
Jesus
Hebrew - Yeshua
Greek - IesusSimon (called Peter)
Hebrew - Shim’on, (surnamed Kefa/Kepha)
Greek - PetrosJames, son of Zebedee
Hebrew - Ya’akov Ben-Zavdai
Greek - IakōbosJohn, son of Zebedee
Hebrew - Yochanan Ben-Zavdai
Greek - IōannēsAndrew
Hebrew - Andreas
Greek - AndreasPhillip
Hebrew - Phillipos
Greek - PhilipposBartholomew
Hebrew - Bar-Talmai
Greek - BartholomaiosMatthew
Hebrew - Mattityahu
Greek - MatthaiosThomas
Hebrew - T’oma
Greek - ThōmasJames, son of Alphaeus
Hebrew - Ya’akov Ben-Halfai
Greek - Iakōbos tou AlphaiouThaddeus
Hebrew - Taddai
Greek - ThaddaiosSimon the Canaanite
Hebrew - Shim’on the Zealot
Greek - Simōn ho KananitēsJudas Iscariot
Hebrew - Y’hudah from K’riot
Greek - Ioudas IskariōtēsCool story bro, here’s your plastic spoon.
Your ignorance only proves how willfully fucking braindead YOU are.
Congratulations. You’ve played yourself.
This is a smooth sharks situation
How do YOU remember to breathe 😆
Well to begin with I don’t waste any brain power on having an imaginary friend. You people really are all mentally ill.
Those aren’t their names in Hebrew. Those are their translated names. Like how Jesus isn’t called Jesus in Hebrew. He’s called Yeshua.
When you try to sell your horseshit story as the infallible word of god but you changed the names for audience palatability. Here’s your plastic spoon.
Their names aren’t infallible words of god. The infallible words are those spoken by Jesus and are the words in red (usually) in the bible.
Also the infallibility is only about the bible being a source for spiritual guidance. It’s not considered infallible in things like science.
As another atheist I’m embarrassed for you if you don’t know these things since you seem so adamantly against religion. Most atheists learn about religions so they don’t look like idiots when they talk to people of faith and refute their religion.
“The Bible is infallible if and only if it makes no false or misleading statements on any matter of faith and practice.”
This is why reddit atheists need to be shot into the sun
Respectfully, I must disagree. Even a social media equivalent of a medical waste dump like reddit serves some minimal kind of a function. Those comments have Twitter cringe written all over them, if not Truth Social.
Don’t forget to breathe dude.
The name was Petros, which is the Greek translation of the arameic word Cephas, meaning rock, or stone. Andrew was Andreas, Philip was Philipos, and so on. The translators of the Bible changed the names to sound more relatable. Your lack of the most fundamental knowledge of history puts you in the category you so flavorfully defined.
Sure, sure, Fish, translation. Translation requires interpretation and as you say the names were changed to appeal to the target demographics. That’s some infallible word of god alright. No better than King James’s further alterations of your favorite fairytale.