Mormons are so funny, I legit feel bad for all the people who have been traumatized by these weirdos, but like these children are called “elders.”
They have all these weird rules where premarital sex is totally not permissible, but they be fucking, and then be like “its not sex with a condom on” or of course soaking. Like straight faced “I’m saving myself for marriage,” and I’m like “we’ve had sex 6 times this week, Genevieve.”
I was at a party in college and this Mormon dude who always did these awkward, overly complicated jive handshakes that felt really violating, was sitting outside upset and depressed holding a half-empty beer. He was like “its all over I’ve sacrificed everything I believe in, for what? So I can drink a beer at a party??” It was one beer he wasn’t even finished with it. Its like relax dude, I’m like 19 and spiraling into alcoholism I think you’ll be okay this one time.
Ive heard so many horror stories, but I’ve only had good and very funny experiences with Mormons. And none of this even gets into the magic underwear or like you get your own planet in the afterlife.
Mormons are so funny, I legit feel bad for all the people who have been traumatized by these weirdos, but like these children are called “elders.”
They have all these weird rules where premarital sex is totally not permissible, but they be fucking, and then be like “its not sex with a condom on” or of course soaking. Like straight faced “I’m saving myself for marriage,” and I’m like “we’ve had sex 6 times this week, Genevieve.”
I was at a party in college and this Mormon dude who always did these awkward, overly complicated jive handshakes that felt really violating, was sitting outside upset and depressed holding a half-empty beer. He was like “its all over I’ve sacrificed everything I believe in, for what? So I can drink a beer at a party??” It was one beer he wasn’t even finished with it. Its like relax dude, I’m like 19 and spiraling into alcoholism I think you’ll be okay this one time.
Ive heard so many horror stories, but I’ve only had good and very funny experiences with Mormons. And none of this even gets into the magic underwear or like you get your own planet in the afterlife.
Idk how people believe in this stuff sober