Summary
Pete Buttigieg will announce he will not run for Michigan’s open U.S. Senate seat in 2026, keeping his options open for a potential 2028 presidential bid.
Many allies advised that a Senate run would conflict with national ambitions.
Buttigieg, a former transportation secretary and South Bend mayor, has built political connections in Michigan, a key swing state.
His decision leaves the race open to replace retiring Sen. Gary Peters.
“I’m an unlikable piece of shit who spent half his life padding a resume full of hollow accolades and corporate yes-man gigs,” Mr. Buttigieg continued. “My home state won’t touch me and I’m worried residents of Michigan are far too familiar with my reputation to give me a free pass into a do-nothing minority party’s safe seat. Better to stick with my role as campaign donation bundler and political hatchet man, until I can find another cushy federal appointment or perhaps a board I can sit on or some new way to fix bread prices in Canada.”
The he let out a loud squeak and began dragging away a large piece of pizza.